Black Star

I've had Radiohead's old song "Black Star" in my head all day now, and either because of Thom Yorke's mumbly delivery or my own inattention to detail, I always thought this was a love song.

I just looked up the lyrics and no, this is not a love song (it's not about Jesus, either).

Actually, Thom doesn't mumble that much.

Black Star, by Radiohead

I get home from work and you're still standing in your dressing gown
Well what am I to do?
I know all the things around your head and what they do to you
What are we coming to?
What are we gonna do?

Blame it on the black star
Blame it on the falling sky
Blame it on the satellite that beams me home

The troubled words of a troubled mind I try to understand what is eating you
I try to stay awake but its 58 hours since that I last slept with you
What are we coming to?
I just don't know anymore

Blame it on the black star
Blame it on the falling sky
Blame it on the satellite that beams me home

I get on the train and I just stand about now that I don't think of you
I keep falling over I keep passing out when I see a face like you
What am I coming to?
I'm gonna melt down

Blame it on the black star
Blame it on the falling sky
Blame it on the satellite that beams me home

This is killing me
This is killing me

Buddy

I just read this article in the NY Times (okay, yeah, it was the "Style" section) about modern parenting and the use of the nickname "buddy," and I was surprised that the author didn't mention J.D. Salinger's character Buddy Glass. I guess Salinger's books came out in the 60s, but it seems like a lot of young parents these days would've read those books and possibly adopted that word for their own kids.

(I mean, my kitty is named after Franny Glass... it worked for me.)

I always thought that by calling him Buddy (his real name is Web), Salinger was (maybe?) making him the Jesus-y type, or, in other words, confirming that Buddy is just that: a friend to all. Buddy is the most likable Glass family character, isn't he? I found a description of him as a "spiritual guide" to the other characters on a website offering analysis on this book for students; it's been a long time since I did this kind of analysis myself  but that makes a lot of sense, considering that Buddy was supposedly a representation of Salinger himself, and that religious themes were a big deal in those books.

(Somebody told me last week that they "used to think you were smart," and I'm still trying to figure out if this was a diss, or a compliment. Am I still smart, or has it left me? It's possible I seem dumber now; I'm very tired most of the time, and I'm not that great at writing down my thoughts, though the quantity of words required to do so seems to be increasing. I know, I know, it's quality, not quantity!)   Anyway, I don't know, I'm struggling to connect J.D. Salinger's decision to name his character "Buddy" to some young dad calling his kid "Buddy" in the playground. I felt the connection when I was reading the article but I'm not making my point very well, am I (this is a rhetorical question; please see below). And, yeah, it's possible (but not a sure thing) that if I took longer to think about it more, I could figure out how to say what I feel in a better way, but come on. That's not going to happen. Not today, anyway!)

(Our nicknames for our own little child tend to be even more descriptive: "Booger Boy," "Cutest Boy in the World," etc. They change based on the situation.)

So, the other day I got an anonymous comment on a (admittedly long and rambling) silly blog post from 2007, and the writer made a polite request: "Please get off the internet" (no punctuation). I didn't publish that comment because, fuck, man, how rude!, but also because this is my blog and I can be as dumb as I want to. You're the one with the choice to read or not to read; I only choose to write or not to write. Whether or not it's any good seems to be totally beside the point. Enjoy or don't, that's up to you! Maybe you, Mr/Ms Anonymous, are the one who should get off the Internet! Makes no difference to me!

Have a nice day, everybody!

Oh, so that's the kind of day it's going to be.

The baby was still asleep when I left for work this morning. He was lying in his bed, on his back, with one arm curled up around his head. He was a little squished over to the side, and his stuffed giraffe was on the floor (we accidentally left his kitty at my mom's this weekend, and he's been looking for it. I've been trying to substiute the giraffe but he's not really buying it). The other arm was under the new quilt I just bought him off of eBay (it's a Pottery Barn quilt, and sort of matches his sheets and bumper, which we left on even though we switched him to the toddler bed last week. The sheets and bumper are also from PB, and have an airplane motif, and the quilt has cars on it, but they're all the same shade of blue, and whether or not they match exactly doesn't really matter to me as long as they're all 100% cotton, and of that Pottery Barn quality that I like. And yay for eBay, because it was cheap). He looked so sweet there, just, so totally perfect, that (and, OK, this is going to get sappy, so if you're extra sensitive to that kind of thing, best if you just go now) it made me cry.

I kissed him very lightly on his forehead and crept out of his room. I went to the kitchen, where Patrick was making himself a cup of coffee. He didn't look up when I walked in the room, but he asked me if I had had my coffee. I said yes, but I guess I sounded strange, because then he asked me what was wrong. I said, "He's so cute!" and started to cry some more. We both started laughing, and now I'm laughing and crying, putting on my shoes, which, I don't even know why they were in the kitchen. He gave me a big hug goodbye, and then I left.

So I'm still kind of weepy, right, but I know I'm silly. I got in the car and turned on KROQ, where they were talking about yesterday's Olympic soccer game between the USA and Canada. Apparently it was a close, exciting game, and Kevin was telling us about it. Normally when Kevin and Bean talk about sports I turn it right off (and Kevin's stories are almost always unlistenable), but for some reason today I left it on. So Kevin's playing all this audio from the actual game, and talking about the overtime and crap, and it gets to the point where it turns out the US ladies had won the game. And he's playing the audio of the announcer and the crowd, and it was very emotional for me, apparently, that the US women's soccer team won their semifinal match against Canada, because there I was again, on the 605 freeway, crying.

About a soccer game.

Anyway, I got over it pretty quickly: I don't really even like soccer. It's possible that I am pre-menstrual. It's possible that I need a cookie.

One last thing: Jenna

People magazine has this inane feature on their very last page where they ask a celebrity some silly questions. I am always amused (or is it bemused?) by their generally stupid answers... I mean, what's so special about these people? And so I decided to play along. I'm just as fascinated by myself as they are. Or something.

Here's Jenna Elfman, who looks pretty damn awesome in the photo. 40 suits her. 

LAST FAMILY VACATION
Jenna: We recently went camping for a couple of nights; the first time for the boys (sons Story, 4, and Easton, 2). [I love the name "Story"!!!] For me it was fine because I was in the RV. My husband (Bodhi, 42) was in a tent, and the wind and rain were so hard it pushed it straight down to his face. [Hmmm. Bet the 2 year old loved it?]  

Irene: Last August we went to Aptos for the annual Valentino family reunion. We took JP, who was, at the time, only 6-1/2 months old. It's what, a 6 hour trip? We made many, many breastfeeding stops along the way. We stayed in a very nice Holiday Inn Express in Watsonville. We're doing the same trip this year.  

LAST THING I COOKED
Jenna: I'd have to cook in order to answer that one! [I don't get this answer. Is it supposed to be clever?] I put a great piece of toaster the other day and buttered it up real good. [I'm no cook either, so I better watch the snarky comments.]  

Irene: I microwaved a couple of leftover slices of pizza yesterday; I toasted a bagel; I made coffee; I fried JP an egg.  

LAST GAME I PLAYED
Jenna: I was playing ninas with my sweet boys just the other night.  

Irene: We named Jules' stuffed giraffe "Martin" and were playing hide and seek with him, while I sang a little song about him, which went something like "Martin is a giraffe, giraffe, giraffe..." Does this qualify as a game? hey, at least I'm not introducing a 2 year old to the concept of "ninja."  

LAST TIME I TOOK PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION
Jenna: In New York City. I always take the subway, always. It's theraputic [I think the word you're looking for, Jenna, is "plebian"]. It's honestly one of the most pleasurable things in life. It's so convenient and the people watching is awesome.  

Irene: Patrick and I went to Chicago and Washington D.C. before I got pregnant. We always love to travel someplace and then use public transportation. It's just so much more fun than renting a car. You learn a lot about somebody while you're trying to read the metro map.  

LAST SPLURGE
Jenna: This week I bought a bunch of shoes. I'm more able to resist buying everything in sight [well, lucky you, Jenna Elfman!], but Tom Ford is making great shoes right now and there is nothing I can do about it [again: is she trying to be funny?]. They're comfortable and the foxiest things ever.  

Irene: This question is so similar to the "last impulse buy" question they just asked Usher! I guess the spending habits of celebrities is what we're interested in. And damn, I did a Google image search on Tom Ford's shoes, and she's right: some of them are beautiful. Man, to have her disposable income!

She's really pretty.

One last thing: Usher

People magazine has this inane feature on their very last page where they ask a celebrity some silly questions. I am always amused (or is it bemused?) by their generally stupid answers... I mean, what's so special about these people? And so I decided to play along. I'm just as fascinated by myself as they are. Or something.
I'm sitting in the nail salon, and they have the June 18, 2012, issue. The subject is Usher. My answers will follow his, which, honestly, sound like they were tweeted. 

LAST TIME I STAYED UP LATE
Usher: Last night. I stay up all night, every night. I work late or plan things for the following day. I usually get three or four hours of sleep. But I can function. [So can I, Usher! Try breastfeeding for 18 months!]

Irene: Last night. On a regular basis, I try to go to bed by 9:30, which is around Jules' bedtime. We realized that trying to put him to bed earlier just makes us all unhappy, and he will almost always go grab his stuffed kitty cat and go to his room on his own by 9:30, sometimes earlier. Yesterday he took a nice long nap during the day, however, and wasn't sleepy until around 10:15. He fell asleep with me on the couch, watching the Olympics. I stayed up until around 11 until I crashed, too. No matter what time I go to bed, though, he wakes up around 1:45, 2 o'clock every morning, and again at around 4:30. I feed him, and then hopefully we both go back to sleep. And then the alarm goes off at 4:45 and I get up to start my day. Unless it's the weekend, when JP will sleep until 6 or 6:30.

LAST COSTUME I WORE
Usher: Last week was safari week at my sons' school. I wore huge, goofy shoes shaped like gorillas [what???] and a safari hat. It was so perfect, but I looked ridiculous.

Irene: I was in a play called "The Bacchae" at City Garage theater about 6 years ago. My costume was a black leotard and a large diaphanous scarf thing that covered my entire body. I was "Flutist."

LAST IMPULSE BUY
Usher: At an art store, they had a cool cookie jar on the counter. It's a papa bear with two baby bears climbing on him. It reminded me of my boys (Usher, 5, and Naviyd, 3) [That's a sweet story, but what the hell kind of art store sells cookie jars? Did he paint it himself?].

Irene: Lunch. I won't tell you what it was but it was very, very, bad.

LAST TV SHOW I WATCHED
Usher: The Price is Right. I know all the prices. I'm famous for a bargain [really? that's what he's famous for?]; it's good to know the price of things [yes, Usher, this is true. It is good to know the price of things]. And it's a fun show too! But, you know, it's just not the same now that good old Bob Barker is gone. [Right, good old alleged sexual harasser Bob Barker. And, I HATE this show. I suspect that Usher and I would have very little in common.]

Irene: NBC's coverage of the Olympics. I don't get to watch too much TV these days!

LAST THING I CLEANED

Usher: It's my pet peeve when I go to a restaurant and the silverware isn't new. So I always ask for a tall glass of boiling hot water, put the knife and fork in it and clean them off. But I'm not a germaphobe! [This is the weirdest fucking story I've ever heard. Questions! a) what the hell restaurants is this guy going to? b) can't he afford to just carry his own sterilized gold-plated utensils with him? c) wouldn't it bug the hell out of you to have this guy ask for a glass of boiling hot water??? And the people who dine with him - they just sit there while he immerses his "dirty" utensils in a glass of hot water? Does he also carry dish soap with him? Usher, this habit of yours would be my pet peeve.]

Irene: We had a minor fly infestation over the weekend in the kitchen, thanks to a banana we didn't even know we had that committed suicide in a corner of the counter where typically bananas don't even go - it was gross. Luckily I wasn't home when Patrick discovered the banana, but I did see the flies themselves, who were taken care of with some simple non-toxic fly strips (and lots of patience). I washed the whole kitchen. Literally.

What's he doing in this picture? Does his knee hurt?

Happy world breastfeeding week!

From the World Health Organization:

World Breastfeeding Week is celebrated every year from 1 to 7 August in more than 170 countries to encourage breastfeeding and improve the health of babies around the world. It commemorates the Innocenti Declaration made by WHO and UNICEF policy-makers in August 1990 to protect, promote and support breastfeeding.

Breastfeeding is the best way to provide newborns with the nutrients they need. WHO recommends exclusive breastfeeding until a baby is six months old, and continued breastfeeding with the addition of nutritious complementary foods for up to two years or beyond.

I can't believe I'm still doing it! We have tapered off considerably in the last few months... JP and I are pretty much at that "don't offer, don't refuse" place. When I work, he's mostly down to twice a day: once in the early morning, around 2 or 2:30 a.m., and when I get home from work, or around 6, 6:30. If I am home, like on the weekends, he gets more. If I'm not home, like on some Thursdays when I go straight to Culver City from work, he gets less.

On the weekend, I was feeling a little run-down by it, though. He's 18 months old! It's a lot of work, even just a few times a day. And dude, my boobs get sore. He can be a challenge: he's so full of energy right now! Sometimes it seems like he's all arms and legs. We discovered this week that he prefers the flavor of almond milk (unsweetened) to cow's milk, so we've switched him over to that. We read about it and understand the importance of making sure he's getting enough fats and dairy to cover the difference. It's fun to watch him drink it - he really gets into it. So though I'm not ready to quit (I did a little reading about weaning yesterday to see if I thought I could really do it, and even though I sometimes really, really want to, I'm just not ready! Two. We'll do it when he's two), I realize that I don't have to do all the work myself.


My initial goal was only six months, and then I struggled so much in the first three that I thought I wouldn't make it... but I survived that horrible bout of mastitis and infection and crazy skin problems and surgery and daily trips to Kaiser, so they could repack my wound, and where I had to get used to breastfeeding in public, and all the awesome nurses we met! And then we finally found a good lactation consultant (Ellen Steinberg), who saved us from quitting early. I have my friend Julie to thank for giving me her information - she helped us so much.

When I hit my six month goal, at which point, I was back at work and pumping 4 times a day! I can't believe I did that! Making sure every day that I had 4 bottles of milk for JP (16 ounces a day!) was really hard work. I jealously hoarded my freezer stash, and kept track of it so that the milk didn't spoil or get wasted. And then there was that awful moment one time when I dropped a bottle on the kitchen floor and I watched my "liquid gold" form a puddle under the refrigerator! I worried that the daycare was wasting it, and then there was the time the teacher told me he needed more milk and I freaked out! And the time I miraculously pumped something like 12 ounces in one sitting! And the time I set up my pump and attached myself to it and forgot to screw on one of the bottles, and pumped milk all over the leg of my pants! And all the sleep I lost when he was getting up every three hours in the middle of the night to feed (which he did up until about 14 months old!). Wait, I'm still losing sleep, aren't I?

When I stopped pumping (at around 13 months) at work, we noticed that he got his first ear infection... and then a month later he got another one... and another one, so I wonder about the correlation there. It's part of the reason I know I need to keep going. Hopefully the little bit of milk he's getting from me still is providing him with some protection and nutritional value. I don't know.

He's growing up so fast. I love seeing his little face in the morning, the way he almost always wakes up by popping up in bed and smiling at us. This week we switched him to his toddler bed from his crib, and though it felt a little early to me after it was all done, and we spent two nights trading off sleeping on the floor in front of his bed, I think it was the right decision for us. Last night he woke up at 2 like he always does, and instead of standing up in his crib and howling for us to come get him, he climbed down from his bed and came running into our room, looking for us. The sound of his feet on the hardwood floor woke us up. He didn't cry, he just waited for us to help him up onto the bed. I fed him a little, and he went right back to sleep. I cuddled with him a little and then Patrick took him back to his room.

The other night I got in his bed with him to read him a story, and when I was done, he stayed all cuddled up with me and his little stuffed kitty, and then he started telling the kitty, I think, the story we just got finished reading. His big bright eyes are so sweet, and his crazy, all-out run is so funny, and the way he always makes sure I get a bite of whatever he's eating... I'm so blessed with this little boy, and I'm so proud of myself for sticking it out and continuing to breastfeed and making sure I do whatever I can for him.

We had a garage sale at my mom's house last weekend. Here we are taking a cookie break.

This Year's Model

I made a dumb comment the other day about the overflowing quantity of Elvis Costello songs on my iPod (I can't give you a count right now but it's seriously huge and I don't even have every album. I went nuts at some point and downloaded or imported every album I could get my hands on), and how I feel, sometimes, when an Elvis song comes around on "shuffle" that I don't even want to listen to him because there are so many dang songs they can't all be good.

I was stupid.

I think the thing to do, though, in order to not get overwhelmed is that I have to listen to every album as a whole, in order. Remember when Metallica or whoever it was got all pissed off at iTunes because they felt that selling individual songs was somehow ruining the listener's experience or devaluing the album's artistic merit?

(Do I have that right? I pay so little attention to Metallica that I could've gotten their complaints about iTunes wrong, and I don't care enough about it to look it up. Or maybe they were just complaining about illegal downloads, which of course they have a right to oppose. I oppose illegal downloads. You listen, you pay.)

Anyway, I always thought that was a bullshit way to approach the issue, because clearly they were just pissed off about the amount of money they thought they would be losing from selling one song for 99 cents instead of a whole album for $14.99 (or whatever), and it's my opinion that if I only want one song from their album, I have the right as a consumer to buy that one song. 99 cents is better than nothing, dummies.

The funny thing is, I don't do that. If I hear one song from a band and I like it enough to go seek it out on iTunes, the way MY brain works is, the rest of the album must hold some other gems, right? (I'm naive, I know, and it's why I have a little collection of unlistened to except for one time albums by bands like OK Go and Muse and the Cranberries and Artic Monkeys [I don't know what I was thinking with that one; I can only please temporary insanity]...) But I guess Metallica figures the rest of the world wants to spend their 99 cents (if they even want to spend that much) and never find out about some other song so they can just buy "Enter Sandman." Whatever. But listen up, because I actually own two Metallica albums ("And Justice for All" and "Metallica") even though I think they're idiots and not all that interesting (I'd rather listen to Corrosion of Conformity. I only have one of their albums, though I think Patrick has more. The album I have, "Corrosion of Conformity," is so good, and yes, every song there is terrific), yet I still purchased those records because I think, from a pop culture standpoint, they have some value.

Not much, but some.

So anyway, what the fuck does this have to do with Elvis Costello?

I just listened to "This Year's Model" from 1978 and while I guess for most people in the world, it goes without saying, that is a hell of an album. Each song stands on it's own just fine, but as a whole, it's a wave of goodness from beginning to end that made the middle of my day incredibly fine. "Incredibly fine" sounds like faint praise, but I mean, fine, as in "of superior quality, skill or appearance." Elvis doesn't skimp on the quality.

Now I've moved on to "My Aim is True" and Elvis is making the time consuming, dull task that I set myself to much more enjoyable. Loving it. I only wish I was driving somewhere, because in motion is the way I really love to listen to music.

(I have a similar problem with David Byrne's solo albums... I love the man, but dude: prolific! Slow it down, buddy!)

Today's songs

Patrick and Jules were watching TV when I left for work this morning at 6:06 a.m. (my new work schedule, 6:30 to 5, is working out perfectly. Traffic in the morning has been super light, and getting home around 5:45 most nights is so much better than 6:20), and one of the shows they watch is called "Fireman Sam." Patrick likes singing the theme song in a punk style. As I was walking out the door, I started singing Bauhaus' "Telegram Sam" and said, "I think that's what you're thinking of!"

Of course I had to listen to it in the car after that.

The rest of these songs fell in alphabetically.

1. Telegram Sam, by Bauhaus (they started this journey!)
2. Telepathy, by Lene Lovich (this song is so funny. I don't think she meant it to be, but what do I know? I've been having trouble with my sense of humor lately. "Trouble" as in, I don't get when people are messing with me - it's happened twice in a week! - and get my feelings hurt. Or maybe people just aren't as funny as they think they are. Could be either one, or possibly both.)
3. The Telephone is Empty, by Love and Rockets (from Earth Sun Moon: a really great album. I might listen to the whole thing later)
4. Telephone Line, by Electric Light Orchestra (makes me cry... what a dork)
5. Tell 'em Boy!," by Mike Watt (I have no idea who's singing. Wikipedia is no help. I'll look it up later.)
6. Ten Years Gone, by Led Zeppelin (this song took me right up into the parking lot; one of my all time favorite Zeppelin songs)
7. Ten Years Gone, by Rockabye Baby! (cracks me up! If you don't know Rockabaye Baby!, and you have a kid, you should check them out. They do acoustic lullaby versions of real music, and it's pretty awesome. We have a whole bunch of them: Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Radiohead etc. JP likes them, too, but maybe because I always sing along. My only criticism is, sometimes they change the placement of the melody, or there's no obvious point at which it starts, so I'm listening to what I think is an 8 bar intro, waiting to start singing, and it turns out they've been in the melody section for 2 measures already.)

Now that I'm in the office, I'm continuing to listen from where I left off. I like the T section on my iPod. Note: I skipped some songs, so this is by no means representative of all the songs on my iPod! And, for some reason it synced my mom's music, so there's like, Dolly Parton and Jimmy Swaggert crap on there too. Obviously skipped!

1. Tension, by Minutemen (just over a minute long: totally perfect in every way)
2. Tentative Decisions, by Talking Heads (love the marching band beat)
3. Terms of Psychic Warfare, by Husker Du (I let this one play twice. Totally reminds me of a Magnolia Thunderpussy song. Surprisingly pretty, and great lyrics)
4. Territorial Pissings, by Nirvana (that off key opening drives me nuts! but once past it... awesome song)
5. Testify, by Rage Against the Machine (better than coffee but I still drank mine)
6. Thank You for Sending Me an Angel, by Talking Heads (Love!!!!)
7. That's Entertainment, by the Jam (I wish I'd been more into the Jam as a kid. I love them now but this is perfect 80s teen soundtrack music)
8. That's the Way, by Led Zeppelin (OK, this song is PERFECT. This is actually from my 80s teen soundtrack, for sure.)
9. That Old Black Magic, by Keely Smith & Luis Prima (my brother bought this for JP. It's fun. And this is a great classic song. Keely rocks it.)
10. That Was My Veil, by PJ Harvey and John Parrish (I was talking about yearning the other day... Polly Jean totally gets it)
11. TheHollowEarth, by Thom Yorke (hate to admit it but I never listened to this before. I don't even know when I got this album! Glad I heard it now.)
12. Thela Hun Ginjeet, by King Crimson (for some reason I only have a live version of this on my iPod, from their album "Absent Lovers" - needless to say, it's pretty damn perfect. By the way, "thela hun ginjeet is an anagram of "heat in the jungle." Bet you didn't know that! And these guys are such good musicians it's insane.)
13. There's a Spy in the House of Love, by Animal Logic (Stewart Copeland's band; also I think he was married to the singer. Not exactly my favorite song... it's kind of corny. Sorry, Stew!!!)
14. There's a Story in Your Voice, by Elvis Costello (with Lucinda Williams on vocals. I didn't think I would like this song... but I do. I'll be honest, I love Elvis but feel like THERE'S TOO MUCH MUSIC sometimes. How can anyone keep up?)
15. There's a World, by Neil Young (this song is all science fiction-y to me. The harp, the timpani, the flute: what was he thinking?)
16. There's Been an Accident, by Twilight Singers (Greg Dulli [from the Afghan Whigs]'s band. Really interesting song. I suggest you listen to it. It's almost but not quite got that feel of being in 8 that I love. I guess it's how the drummer is accenting the beat?)
17. There's No Secrets This Year, by Silversun Pickups (fun, poppy, great beat, and I love when the guy sings too. The last few seconds are beautiful)
18. There Ain't No Santa Claus, by Captain Beefheart (Shut up, Don!)
19. There Goes My Gun, by Pixies (I wish I was this creative. Seriously. Geniuses.)
20. There, There, by Radiohead, and Rockabye Baby!(my iPod battery needed to be charged at this point, so I switched over to my iPhone's music. I have a lot less to choose from. This is one of my favorite Radiohead songs. The Rockabye Baby! version is fun, too)
21. This is Love, by PJ Harvey (again with the yearning, Polly Jean!!!!)
22. This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody) by Talking Heads (I've said it before countless times: the best song ever)
23. This World Over, by XTC (awesome 80s)
24. Three is a Magic Number, by Blind Melon (Shannon Hoon and his bandmates do a fun, perfect version of this song. Oh, Shannon. Miss you.)
25. Three Sisters, by the Veils (I love, love, love, the Veils!!!! That guy's voice is so rad. He's up there with Adrian Belew as one of my favorite singers)
26. Tick, by Yeah Yeah Yeahs (I just got this album; I'm a few years behind. This is a sexy ass song.)
27. The Tide That Left and Never Came Back, by the Veils (seriously, I can't recommend the Veils enough.)
28. Tonight, by Lene Lovich (that's her playing the saxophone. She's a trip.)
29. Too Real, by Meat Puppets (from one of my favorite albums. Every song is perfection.)
30. True Love, by X (Ah, X. You would know about love, wouldn't you?)
31. True Love Pt. 2, by X (Because once is never, ever enough.)
32. Two Rivers, by Meat Puppets (see what I mean? Awesome song.)

And that wraps up the Ts. There's probably more on my iPod, which should be charged by now, but I am drowning in music now. My brain is totally full.

No orifice necessary?

So, last Thursday, my education on sea slugs continued. I'm going to have to get a book, because there just isn't enough time before we play or between songs in flute choir for my friend Diane (the sea slug specialist) to give me the beginner's introduction to sea slugs lecture that I (without realizing it) really want.

Also, for the record: any errors in what I'm about to write are purely the result of my lack of understanding and/or ignorance. She's a scientist, and I'm confident that she relayed all this information to me accurately. If I screw up any facts it's because I'm not a good student. I tried to follow up on the things she mentioned briefly that really interested me by doing some quick Internet research, so again, any errors are purely my own fault (or the fault of the websites I consulted; all information from the Internet has a link for follow up if necessary).

Anyway, proving that I am forever immature, last week I asked her about the whole "violent mating" business that was mentioned on the website she sent me to  (http://instructional1.calstatela.edu/pkrug/lab/; now, taking a second look, I'm not seeing that anymore. Hmmm. I wonder if it was removed because of something I said? I hope not. I think it's interesting, and not because I'm lech, I just think it's interesting).

This is what I learned:

The sea slugs she's studying are hermaphrodites. Unlike Scout Finch, who, after all, was what? Seven years old?, I happen to know what a hermaphrodite is. Here's my definition (then I'm going to look it up to make sure I got it right):

A hermaphrodite possesses both male and female sexual organs.

Maybe not scientifically complete but I think that's about it. It's not that complicated of a concept, even for me.

So, okay, no biggie, right? Sure, except these slugs (or some of them?) don't decide who will take which role by politely discussing it. When they're ready to go, they are ready to go, and they both want dominance. Their male sex organ, which, by the way, emerges from the right side of their heads, is more like a weapon, sort of, and they fight each other to figure out which one shall be the giver, and which one shall be the receiver. They just start poking each other. They don't have a target, either: they do it through the skin. Hence the title of today's post (did you really need a "hence" statement? No? sorry).

Here's a scientific explanation, from here:

Hypodermic insemination, in which sperm is injected through the partner's body surface, is also widespread, particularly among the Sacoglossa. Many species with hypodermic insemination have developed special penis armature, such as a sharp stylet. In some species, sperm is injected through the body surface directly into the receptive organs while in others injection can take place anywhere into the partner's body.

So, here are two words together that should never ever be together, at least not in my experience: "penis armature." Armature sounds... painful. No thanks. I'm not kinky like that.

From freedictionary.com:

2. Biology A protective covering, structure, or organ of an animal or a plant, such as teeth, claws, thorns, or the shell of a turtle.

Also, "sharp stylet" - another two words I would prefer to not have describing my partner's sex organ. I don't even need to turn to the dictionary - I can get quite a good mental image from the words themselves.

Finally, Diane explained to me that these slugs are pretty small - less than an inch. I looked at the beautiful photographs on the website she sent me to, and imagined these guys as big winged banana slugs (banana slugs can get to be half a foot long). I guess there are some sea slugs that are that big (and please God, may I never meet a slug that big, either on land or in the ocean), but those are not the ones she's studying. The ones she's studying are tiny, and in fact, one of the ways scientists like her find them is by using their sense of smell. I'm going to have to ask her about this some more, but she mentioned that when she goes up north to study them, she can smell them (and it's a pleasant smell; I read somewhere that some slugs smell like watermelon. Diane suggested that they smell "floral"). I want to find out more about this next. When I do, you can bet I'll be sharing it with you, too.

Like it or not.

Lyrics for you today...

More lyrical silliness. I'm listening to the Minutemen while working. Today's song is Disguises. Don't be jealous, go get your own.

Disguises
The distance between black and white
Is much further than I would like
Until now I never noticed
That fascism has
Many disguises

Mollusks on Mars!

I emailed my friend the other day to let her know that I'd written about our slug conversation (here, and then again here; I'm a bit obsessed), and she gave me a little more information to share with you.

First, here's a link to the lab she works in at Cal State LA. It has lots of really cool photos of the beautiful sea slugs she works with. I think they're called sacoglossa slugs; they practice something called "kleptoplasty." That's a cool word, isn't it? Somehow this kleptoplasty makes them solar-powered, which I don't totally understand (thanks a lot, Wikipedia!) but seems really cool.

Actually, this makes a little sense to me (???):

The sacoglossans can utilise the chloroplasts of the algae on which they feed, which they keep alive for hours to months after their ingestion. They maintain the cells and metabolise the photosynthetic products; this process is termed kleptoplasty, and the sacoglossans are the only animals to employ it; some ciliates and foramanifera (protists) also employ the strategy. Wikipedia.

So they eat the algae and keep it ['s chlorplasts*] alive, which seems a little... brutal, but I guess it's "just" algae, right? Like... lettuce, I suppose? Do I have to read up on algae now? And that somehow makes them solar-powered. Also, these guys have teeth. Oh, and apparently they can turn the same algae stuff that they use for energy (do I understand that right?) into a toxin that they deploy against their enemies! I mean, come on! These guys are pretty smart. What if we could do that? I'll eat a little Greek yogurt for breakfast, and then later, when some bad guy is messing with me? Pow! There's some Greek yogurt for you, asshole!

(That website refers to their "violent mating habits", and that worries me a little. Perhaps more than the fact that they have teeth. The animal kingdom is freaky.)

In our follow up email conversation, she also used the probably very scientific term "terrestrial slug" to refer to the ones in my backyard (as opposed to the ones in the ocean), and that word got me thinking about... (of course, because at my heart I am a nerd) extra-terrestrial slugs. She told me that her advisor, who is a pretty big name in the sea slug world, was asked to try to identify the famous "mollusk on Mars."

Anyway, there you go. More than you ever wanted to know about slugs, maybe. Not me. I am sort of both attracted and repelled by the topic! It's much more fun to think about than I would've ever thought.

*Ah! Now I get it:

Chloroplasts capture light energy, store it in the energy storage molecules ATP and NADPH and use it in the process called photosynthesis to make organic molecules and free oxygen from carbon dioxide and water. Wikipedia.

Harry Bosch is coming to TV!!!!

I'm so excited! I just read a little article in the LA Times that Michael Connelley is teaming up with the guy who writes the TV show "The Wire" to bring his character Harry Bosch, my favorite LA detective, alive on my TV!

It's time to remind you that way back in 2008, I pictured Val Kilmer as Harry, and I'd like to state again that I think Val would be the perfect choice.

WAIT. I just realized that Harry's eyes are brown, and Val's eyes are blue (extremely blue, like, lost in your blue eyes blue, where would you like me to go and when blue). "I just realized" means I checked Wikipedia. Hmmm. Maybe I need to revise this, because Harry's brown eyes are apparently a big deal. It doesn't mean Val couldn't wear contacts or the fact of Harry's eyes could be changed, but it seems like an actual brown-eyed man might be a better choice? Why waste the blue eyes behind contacts?

(Can you tell I have a thing about blue eyes? It's 'cause mine are boring old brown, I think.)

If not Val, then who? Great, now I have to rethink this.

Random lyrics for you today

I know I blogged today already, but here I am, getting a bunch of work done while listening to my old friends, fIREHOSE. This song came around, and it's always been special to me.

Under the Influence of Meat Puppets, by fIREHOSE

The future holds a mystery
We talk but don't know
We hope but can't tell
We share but not all
The mystery holds fast
The future, scary
It eludes us though we try
To find meaning everywhere
We want to make plans
But to make another mistake
So difficult we care enough to try
So crazy so we sit and wonder

As a teen, which I was the first time I heard this song, the future was scary. Hey, you know what? Sometimes it still is.

A lot of times their lyrics aren't all that profound or sensical, and I know Patrick likes to make fun of Ed's delivery sometimes, but I like what they've done here. 

Slugs

Last Thursday, I was talking to one of my friends from flute choir. She's going to be leaving us soon, moving on to earn an advanced degree in marine biology. She's been a member with the group for awhile and I'm glad that her final quarter with us is in the summer, which is a little looser and (dare I say it?) more fun than our usual, "we have a concert to put on in 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 weeks" quarters.

Don't get me wrong, I love concertizing ("have gig will practice!") and I love the challenge of it, but I also like sitting around in Patty's living room, sight reading new music or parts I've never played. We also get to talk a little more, and people tend to stick around afterwards to visit. It's nice.

This, however, is not a flute choir post. If it was, it would be over there on that blog.

My friend started telling me what she's been working on this summer.

I lack any kind of basic background in science, so my portrayal of our conversation should only make me look dumb. She definitely knows what she's talking about, I just lack the memory and scientific thinking necessary to talk about anything she said with authority.

That said, it was a fascinating conversation. Without giving too much away about her work (what do I know, this stuff might be secret), she told me that she's comparing specimens from various locations to determine if they share any genetic material. Or something like that. And then she told me how that was done (by computer, using slices that are turned into colors, which sounds pretty, and that statement right there is probably proof enough to you that I am an artistic person and not a very analytical one). She explained that there are long, long, long strings of numbers derived from the color spectrum and the computer compares them all.

I've been playing music with my friend for awhile, and I've heard her play lots of hard, beautiful music (most recently, believe it or not, she totally got into the jazzy feel of "Baby Elephant Walk," our finale at our last concert. I was playing piccolo, and she got to jam. It was fun to listen to), but to see the light in her eyes while she talked about her computer analysis and this complicated process of light and numbers - it was pretty cool.

Then, on Saturday, I was out in the backyard with Jules, and we came across a baby slug slithering around on one of the stepping stones to the garage door. I had a big load of laundry in one hand, and was holding Jules' hand with the other.

I put the laundry down so that we could look at it. It was tiny, this little baby slug.

You should know that slugs and snails and spiders and creepy crawlies of pretty much any kind? I am not a fan. In fact... I am a little scared of these things. They're just gross. But I have a boy. And I realize that boys like dirt and bugs and I'd better make sure that my attitude about those things, not necessarily bad in and of themselves, doesn't transfer to him. I don't want him to be afraid of snails just because they're "icky." (Actually, I stepped on one barefoot, a long long time ago, while walking my ex-boyfriend out to his car one night, and it's possible that that incident scarred me more than I care to admit.) And what if one day, he wants to do something like what she's doing and gets that look in his eye about slugs? Or something like them? So we kneeled down and watched this almost cute little slug wiggle around on the ground for about, oh, I'd say, 20 seconds, max.

Then I said, "Okay, sweetie, let's go in the house now!" And we did.

Updated: If I had a girl I'd be okay with it if she liked dirt and bugs and stuff too. I'm not saying girls can't like that stuff, I'm just saying that I'm not thrilled with it. I'm not trying to restrict my kid's activities based on his sex or gender, or whatever. He can do whatever interests him!

Back to it!

I came back to work this morning. I drove in drinking my yummy coffee (yesterday I had 4 cups which is way too much!) and listening to some awesome music - here's a partial playlist:

1. Lazy Eye, by Silversun Pickups
2. Crosseyed and Painless, by the Talking Heads (continuing the theme; for those who haven't noticed, this is my affliction)
3. Atoms for Peace, by Thom Yorke
4. Making Plans for Nigel, by XTC



It's quite a nice shot of my surprisingly
clean dashboard, no?

5. Everywhere That I'm Not, by Translator

There was hardly any traffic (I think I'm taking the week before the 4th of July off every year; coming back to a 3 day week is an excellent idea, especially when the day off is a Wednesday!), and I flew down the 710 (except for the time I got behind some dude doing 60 in the fast lane). Oh, and I think I saw Steve Sanders. He and I trailed each other, then I lost him for awhile. He caught up to me at the 5, and I waved as he passed. No idea if he was even paying attention but it's fun when you keep seeing the same car. Isn't it? Or is that just me?

Anyway, I got in to work 6 minutes early, and I sat in the car and listened to one more song (Love is the Drug, by Roxy Music) in the parking lot while I looked for my work ID badge, which I thought was in my car but apparently isn't. I did change purses a couple of times while I was off, so who knows, maybe it's at home. Patrick will look. The baby enjoys playing with it, so that could be the problem.

Once I got up to my desk, I had to change my computer password (it expired while I was out) and I found 149 emails waiting for me. Not bad, actually. I've had worse. Though, I was just talking to a friend who claims to receive 400 emails on a daily basis (I said "claims" as if to imply I don't believe them, but I do!); if this were my life, I might have to kill myself. Seriously. 400 emails!? No. That's all I  have to say about that: NO.

One of the messages in my in-box was this one, which was sent in response to an invitation to a Lunch and Learn session I had sent out to the whole department while I was gone.

From: MC
Sent: Monday, July 02, 2012 7:27 AM
To: Irene Palma
Subject: Nutrition sessions

Irene,

In the event you may not be aware but most of us in the Purchasing and Contracts Services are, even the week inclusive of the 12th, extremely busy with last minute deadlines before the official fiscal year closing for purchase transactions. These health-related sessions are well intended but very untimely, at least for this department.

MC

After I stopped laughing (it took awhile), I sent this response:

From: Irene Palma
Sent: Monday, July 02, 2012 7:38 AM
To: MC
Cc: AA [my boss; I thought she might need a laugh, too]
Subject: RE: Nutrition sessions

Hi, M,

Unfortunately I had no prior knowledge of the deadlines in your section. We will be attempting to schedule these events more frequently. Hopefully there will be a future Lunch & Learn that will work for you.

Thank you,
Irene

Irene Casarez Palma, Administrative Assistant II
Departmental Wellness Manager
Human Resources - Risk Management Section
(323) XXX-XXXX / Telephone
(323) XXX-XXXX / Fax

Then I got this message, which kind of blew my mind with it's earnestness. 

From: MC
Sent: Monday, July 02, 2012 7:42 AM
To: Irene Palma
Subject: RE: Nutrition sessions

That would be good. I was lucky to have learned nutrition straight from Dietitians who worked with me and for me. I will look forward to another session as we cannot know too much about what is good for us.

What is good for us? Who can say? I look forward to finding out, too. I feel a little bad for laughing now. But not too bad.

Thursday

I'm at the car wash.

My car is so dirty! I've been coming to this car wash since I moved to Long Beach 12 years ago. I can't believe I've lived here so long. They do a good job. The only thing I don't like is, they always do the Porsches and BMWs near the front, and my little Honda always seems to be parked off to the side. What, it's a nice car!

It's not the worst car here, either.

I always like pairing up people with their car. This is a nice area, so most of the people and their cars always seem fancy to me. There's an older black Mercedes sedan that I've tied to the woman sitting next to me. She's got frizzy brown hair, is wearing unfashionable but probably very expensive brown sandals, and drinking a small bottle of Fiji water. She has a nice beige leather handbag that would fit with my lifestyle quite well. She just pulled out a manilla folder with some sort of manuscript. It could be anything: I can't see it well enough to tell. I'm nosy but discreet! A contract, a play: anything. She has a pen out so who knows? Maybe she's editing her book. I seem to know a lot of writers these days.

As of yesterday I was pretty happy on my vacation but today feels a little bit like too much of a good thing. I had a dream that I went back to work today. Maybe I should. Except for the flip flops I could get away with this outfit in the office. Well, maybe I'd need a cardigan: my t-shirt is pretty casual. I wonder if new shoes would cure this feeling. I'm willing to try it. Patrick is too busy to have lunch with me. He had an interview yesterday and now has to catch up on a conference call for a meeting he missed.

My car was done faster than I expected so I never found out who the owner of the black Mercedes was. Somehow I will have to live without knowing.

Now I'm waiting for this guy to call me back. Last week when I went to the Apple store at the Cerritos mall, after telling me he couldn't replace my phone, Genius Nathan recommended that I check out this kiosk out in the mall. It just so happens they are opening a real store across the street where they replace screens, this week. The store is opening this week, was that clear? I just called the kiosk and the dude said he'd check with his manager to see if they're opening today or tomorrow. Either one works for me. Maybe foe a grand opening they'll have lower prices. I want to get this thing fixed without spending too much money on it.

Meanwhile I am self-medicating with the Talking Heads. Loud. The only thing that sucks about having a clean car is you have to wait too long to roll down the windows. I need the wind in my hair now.

Hello from... home!

Starting last Thursday, I have been off from work. In a great big blowout of vacation time, I decided to use all my accrued time and take off for a week. A week plus one day. It has been, in a word, awesome. I miss not one thing related to work at all.

Last Thursday night was the flute choir concert. Fun night! My favorite piece was called Songs of the Ocean, by a Japanese composer named Hirose. I was lucky enough to get the flute 1 part alone, and I have to say, that flute 1 part and I were kind of made for each other (when I've been practicing). Hey, I have to say it: I know what I'm good at, and it's stuff that's romantic and floaty and possibly Japanese-sounding. It was a lot of fun to play.

I'm still looking for a good recording of it; for now, you can read a thrilling (?) description, here. Depending on how in tune we were, I might post a recording later. Check back at http://ccfcinfo.blogspot.com later. I'm sure I will mention it if/when that happens.

We also played Schubert (fun!), something called Mock Morris (with two piccolos! Me and Paula kicked butt on that one!), and a totally dorky arrangement of "Baby Elephant Walk." Guess which one my dad loved the best? Still, I love that he's been coming to these concerts lately; my sister and mom babysat the baby for me, and he chose to come to the concert instead of staying home to play with him. And the fun part of Baby Elephant was my friend Carol played the drums (abandoning her flute temporarily). Inside every flutist is a drummer, I guess!

After the concert I got to visit with some old friends, and since Patrick and his band were at a gig in Bakersfield and wouldn't be home until late, JP and I stayed overnight in Culver City. That was pretty cool, too. I miss you, Culver City!

Oh, and at some point on Thursday night, I dropped my iPhone on the hard cement floor in the girls' room at Farragut, but we won't be talking about that right now.

Saturday, we went to a graduation party for my niece, who kicked butt at her K-8 Catholic school and has been promoted to one of the local Catholic High Schools. Man, I can't believe she's growing up. Her mom was pregnant with her at my bridal shower!

Dude, I've been married for a long time!

Sunday I spent with my friends at a recital. I played a trio with Megan and Patrick, two recent high school graduates, students of my (former) flute teacher. They did a great job, as did all the other performers. I had the easiest stuff to play, and I have to say, I was pretty awestruck by all the performances. Megan played a gorgeous solo that I can't remember the name of (but I loved the piece), and she played a duet with my friend Marilyn that knocked me out.

Everybody sounded so grown up and so good that I was totally inspired. I think I need some more flute playing in my life. I like that I can recognize that. I have no idea how I'm going to make more time for it, but I will try.

On Monday we went to the beach with our friends Sean and Teresa, and their little daughter, who will soon be 1. It was JP's first trip to the beach, but after discovering that that beach is one of the most polluted beaches in all of Southern California, we all decided to stay on the sand. And thus, eye and ear infections were avoided by all. Still, we had a great time. Patrick and Sean got sunburned (kind of everywhere), I got a weird patch of redness on my left thigh only, and the kids, who were better protected, had no redness whatsoever. It was a beautiful day.

Yesterday I relaxed, slept in (8:30! Just think: two years ago, if I had to get up at 8:30 I would've been all, WTF!? This is not sleeping in!), rode my bike around town, and generally enjoyed myself immensely. Today has pretty much been a repeat of same. I wanted to ride my bike, and I'm so glad I have. I didn't go on any long rides (I rode about 8 miles total each day, which is nothing), but I did have fun running my errands on the bike instead of using the car.

My car sits, unused and dirty, in the exact same place I parked it Sunday. Or maybe it was Saturday. I can't remember. I like that so much.

Last night we visited with my brother-in-law and his wife and kids. It was my nephew's birthday, so we had cupcakes and ice cream. JP played with my niece pretty hard, and fell asleep on the way home, even through a trip to WalMart for kitty food (he and I waited in the car). Then, some kind of miracle happened, because in spite of a 3 hour nap at daycare, he then proceeded to sleep in his crib without waking up until 2 a.m.

That's kind of amazing. And, when he woke up at 2, all that I needed to do was nurse him a little bit, and he went right back to sleep, in his crib, until 6 a.m.

Fingers crossed that it wasn't a fluke!

Tomorrow night Patrick has another gig (not so far away this time, though), and we're starting summer flute choir... so I am considering another Culver City sleepover at my mom and dad's with the baby. He had a good time, and it worked out so nicely last time (the only bad thing: the bed in the spare room at my mom and dad's house has a mattress harder than the back seat of some cars I've been in. No, not lately. Do with that information what you will).

Anyway, I've done a lot of exactly what I wanted to do: ride my bike, read, talk to my friends, play my flute, and eat good food. I cleaned the kitchen this morning, and now it's time for me to straighten up the living room and vaccuum. I'm in the middle of laundry. One thing I haven't done, and I'm kind of proud of myself, is watch a bunch of TV.

I may or may not check in again before I go back to work, so adios for now!

Dream

You guys should all know by now about my involvement with City Garage Theatre. I'm not a performer there (well, sort of not... I was in two plays but that was a long time ago and I'm certainly not an actor), but I worked in the light and sound booth (and will again). It's funny, I had lunch with the director about a month ago, and we were talking to this woman she knows who owns a shop on Main Street in Santa Monica. FM introduced me to the woman as their "light and sound booth operator." The woman happens to have a daughter who does that for a living, and she asked me some technical questions that I don't even remember now but at the time I was all flustered.

I had to answer, "Frederique and Charles have cleverly worked it out so that my training makes me uniquely qualified to only work with them. I wouldn't know the first thing about any other light/sound booth." It was kind of funny because I answered her very properly (we'd all been sort of fooling around and talking casually, playing with the baby, laughing at the weird pig masks she had behind the counter. She was a nice lady). Everyone laughed.

Isn't that weird? Maybe I would know the first thing, but there I go again, not feeling very capable, kind of putting myself down. And, it can't be very hard and probably would be really interesting to learn how to really work a light/sound booth. I mean, as opposed to just hitting "go" and "play." Unless that really is all that's involved, in which case, I am a pro, but I kind of doubt it. I might ask Charles to teach me more next time, if there's time (there usually isn't time).

So, it's been awhile since that happened; I've been thinking about it off and on ever since.

But, that's not what this post is about.

Last night I had a dream that instead of building a super cushy new booth (ha ha) for me in the new space, Charles built me an... orchestra pit. And Frederique put me in charge of hiring an orchestra for the show they were doing (I don't know what the play was). It would be totally cool to have an orchestra and a pit in the new space, but a little... unrealistic.

I don't know who the other musicians were (random dream musicians, apparently) but I hired my friend, bassist Jeff Schwartz. The conductor was my flute teacher/flute choir leader Patty Sikorski. And me. I hired me, because I saw me in the pit with my flute.

I've been in pits with my flute as a semi-professional musician, and it's a lot of fun. I'm mostly fine with the fact that I never earned a college degree in music or worked more as a musician, but sometimes... once in a while... I wonder about it. I mean, then I remember that I'm pretty lazy, a terrible hustler, and not that interested in teaching, so I think ultimately not being a professional musician was a good choice, leaving me to love playing for the sheer joy of playing... right (even to me that sounds a little bullshit-ty)? Oh, well. Too late now, I guess. I should just think about my great pay, 4 day work week, retirement and benefits instead.

Anyway, back to my dream: there was a rehearsal in the pit, and then me and Jeff went for yogurt at some yogurt shop next to the theater afterwards. Is there at yogurt shop at Bergamot Station? There was in my dream. I've never eaten yogurt with Jeff Schwartz. I've never, I don't think, eaten anything with Jeff Schwartz. So I guess that's what dreams are, right?

Maybe next time I can dream about flying or Stewart Copeland, or flying with Stewart Copeland or something. No offense, Jeff, I'm sure getting yogurt with you would be awesome, but maybe I need to dream a little bigger. I mean, if we really wanted to, that's an event that could actually happen, right? No big deal.

So. Note to self: dream bigger.

100 Questions. Because you are a glutton for punishment, and because I am not prepared to write anything else today.

Taken from here. Not a blog I read on a regular basis, but she seems like fun, no?

Are you young at heart, or an old soul?
I am definitely young at heart. Foolishly young at heart. Do with that information what you will.

What makes someone a best friend?
They stick around.

What Christmas (or Hanukkah) present do you remember the most?
My blue and white bike. I think I was 8 or 9. It had a white banana seat with blue flowers on it, a white basket, tassles on the handlebars, and was just all kinds of awesome.

Tell me about a movie/song/tv show/play/book that has changed your life.
The World According to Garp, by John Irving. I read it way too young - I was maybe 12 or 13? Awesome book. Thank you John Irving! Now, I'm not enjoying his most recent book all that much, but I'm thinking one of us needs to try harder.

Name one physical feature that you like about yourself, and one you dislike.
My stomach. Obviously this is one that I dislike. Have you seen my stomach lately? No, and you won't see it, either. On top of having a baby, I just never had a great tummy; baby didn't help anything.

I like my mouth. And my beauty mark.

Would you like to reconnect with any friends you’ve lost contact with?
Some of them. Thanks to Facebook, I have a relationship with some people I'd like to know again, in a closer way, but time and distance keep that from happening. And there are some people who I've reconnected with in just the absolute perfect way. There are others who I think are better as fond (or not-so-fond) memories.

Name a movie that you knew would be terrible just from reading the title.
"What to Expect When You're Expecting;" any Adam Sandler or Will Ferrell movie; any movie with the word "Medea" in the title.

What holiday do you most look forward to?
Thanksgiving. Food paradise.

How is the relationship between you and your parents.
Fine. They are great grandparents.

You’ve got the TV on, but you’re not really watching.
This so rarely happens anymore. I love TV! If it's on, it means the baby is asleep and I'm into it!

What channel is the TV on?
Usually a cooking show, or Patrick is watching Pawn Stars. Occasionally we watch music concerts. And then we watch a lot of Sprouts. I suspect that Patrick has a crush on one of the cute young women who host those shows. Those chicks are hot; I suspect that's why they hire them. I'm sure the kids don't really notice but the daddies sure do!

Name a song that never fails to make you happy.
Just one? Silly you.

Mr. Blue Sky, by Electric Light Orchestra
My Sweet Lord, by George Harrison
New Toy, by Lene Lovich
Love is the Drug, by Roxy Music
Another Time, by Adrian Belew
Big Eyed Beans from Venus, by Captain Beefheart
Science Fiction, by Divinyls
Away, by Meat Puppets
Naive Melody by Talking Heads
Breathless, by X
Into Your Arms, by the Lemonheads

Almost any fIREHOSE song
Lots and lots of Radiohead songs

You know at least one person named Michael. Tell me about him.
He's a comedian, and a newly published author. We met at Rizzoli Bookstore in Santa Monica; he was a clerk, I was one of the managers. He's way smart, super funny, and he thinks I'm funny too. Thinks I can write! What can I say? Someone who is a comedian and who laughs at my lame jokes is a prince.

Have you ever read the “missed connections” on Craigslist? Have you ever posted one, or wanted to?
I read it once, a long time ago. It actually made me a little sad.

If you could pick anywhere to live the rest of your life, where would it be?
I like where I am, but it is a dream of mine to move back to Culver City. On the other hand, on a trip to Portland with Patrick, we kind of fell in love with one of the residential neighborhoods we explored (I can't remember what the area was called but it was near the Kennedy School). There might be better neighborhoods in Portland, but that one grabbed our imagination. I don't know if moving that far away would ever happen, though, or if I would really want to.

Can money buy happiness?
Probably not, but wouldn't it be fun to try to find out?
(everyone answers this one this way!)

Do you drink? Smoke? Do drugs? Why, or why not?
I drink a beer or two now and then. I like beer.
I quit smoking about 8 years ago. It was gross, and it will kill you. And as a flutist, what a dumb thing to do. Once in a great while I miss it. I liked having something to do with my hands, and I liked the way the paper smelled.
The only drugs I do are allergy medicine, Advil, and caffeine. I'm a new coffee drinker, and I'm in love with it. Milk and honey: perfection. I also love my Diet Cokes.

Is there anyone close to you that you know you can’t trust? You don’t have to give names.
Not anymore.

Where was your favorite place to go when you were a little kid?
My uncle Alfredo's house. He lived in a huge house that had all these interesting places to hide and play. Also, he was very creative and had lots of cool stuff (like found art that he would put together, or his girlfriend Helen's artwork). And my cousins were super cool and fun to visit, too. His girlfriend Helen's house in Santa Monica was awesome too: she was an artist, and her home was a converted church. Really neat, loving, exciting people.

Have you ever spent a night in the hospital?
When I had my baby, we spent two nights in the hospital. I didn't want to go home! The nurses were super sweet, and I loved being pampered. Then a couple of months later, I had to have surgery on my breast when I got a pretty bad infection/mastitis. I didn't technically spend the night there but I was there for what felt like a very long time.

Do you enjoy being with only one or two friends, or with a large group of people?
I am much better with one or two friends. I get a little overwhelmed in large groups of people.

Do you like the type of music your parents listen to? Do your parents like the type of music you listen to?
Not really! My mom listens mainly to Christian music, and Country. My dad likes Country too, but he also likes his "oldies", which I do enjoy. My mom always worried that the music I listened to would invite "satan" into my brain. Yes. That is a true statement.

Have you ever been bullied? Have you ever bullied anyone else?
Yeah, I've been bullied, but it's not worth talking about. I don't know if I was really a "bully." I was probably not very nice to some kids at certain points in my life.
If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
I don't think I could do that or would want to.

If your partner wanted to wait until marriage before having sex, would you stay in that relationship?
I'm going to not answer this one. I guess that sounds like my answer would be "no" but who knows? It's not an issue now.

Do you believe in a god?
I don't know. I think so. Here's what I do know, and I'm going to quote Bono: "The god I believe in isn't short of cash, mister." I don't believe in a god that requires funding, or would exclude anyone. I don't believe in the rules that people always get all caught up in. I'm still kind of working this one out. I don't believe that what I believe or what you believe is necessarily what everyone else should believe.

Of all the social networks in the world, why use twitter.
It's fun, once in awhile.

What’s your favorite hashtag to track?
Stewart Copeland, of course. Actually, I don't really track any hashtags. I don't have that kind of time.

Would you call yourself/your family “middle class?”
Now, sure. When I was growing up, no.

Name a TV series you didn’t enjoy until after it ended.
The West Wing. Beverly Hills, 90210.

Have you ever bought a product from an infomercial?
Not ordered from the TV, but I have bought stuff at the "as seen on TV" store. I like that citrus stuff for the laundry. Mostly, though, that stuff is crap.

If you could give up your car and never have to drive again, would you?
YES. If only the places I needed to go were bike-able, or if public transportation was easier to use!

If you go back to one point in time to give advice to yourself, when would you go and what would you say?
Probably my early 20s. Here's what I would say: There are things you want to do but you are afraid: go for it anyway. You have nothing to lose. Literally. You are braver and stronger and more capable than you think.

What’s your “quirkiest” habit?
I write letters in a public place (on a blog) to Stewart Copeland, and I address him as if he and I were actually friends. I like to pretend that I am friends with him! He has never responded. Poor me! I'll keep doing it anyway. Maybe one day he will!

What is “normal?” Are you normal?
I don't know what normal is. Yes. No.

Someone close to you is dying. You have the choice to let this person live for 10 more years, but if you do, you cause the death of 10 strangers. You don’t have to see them die. Do you take the offer?
I don't want to think about this. Sorry.

What is one thing you could never forgive?
I don't know. I tend to forgive everything. If I love you, I love you. And I have a terrible memory.
Forget I said that.

Would you rather be in a relationship after the honeymoon period ends, or be single?
Relationship. There are always things to work on.

Is it possible for guys and girls to be just friends?
Absolutely.

Where do you and your friends go to hang out?
We don't really hang out anymore. Life is not "Friends," or "Cheers."

Write the first sentence of your obituary.
Irene Palma, the youngest, prettiest, third wife of Stewart Copeland, was found dead today. She had a big smile on her face.

This is a joke. Because Fiona Copeland is gorgeous and could probably kick my ass? Yes.

What is the best TV theme song ever?
Ummmm... Alice? What was the name of the show that Valerie Bertinelli was on? I liked that one.

When you were young, what would you dream you would be when you grew up?
A mail carrier. True story.

When you’re alone in your own home, do you walk around naked?
Sure. Alone? I do it when Patrick is around too. What do I care? Nobody can see, and anyway, who else wants to look at me? My house has lots of windows but they mostly face the backyard. It's easy enough to do and we have plenty of privacy. I guess when JP gets older I'll have to cool it, though.

What gets you out of bed in the morning?
The alarm. The baby. The knowledge that I have to go out and earn a living.

Do you want to have more friends than you have right now?
I'd like more time to spend with the friends I have.

What part of the past year sticks out in your mind?
March 31, 2012. Private memory.

You win a scratch-off lottery game that gives you $2000 a week (after taxes) for the rest of your life. Do you keep your job?
Hell no. But wait, can I get another job, later? I would probably need to work again at some point, right? Part-time mail carrier sounds like the perfect job.

Could you be in a long-distance relationship? If you’re in one, what makes yours work?
I don't think so, but it's not really an issue, nor is it likely to ever be an issue.

What’s the best route to your heart?
A sense of humor. A willingness to share everything. Love.

Have you ever met someone through the internet, then met them in real life?
Nope.

What is your favorite sport?
I don't really have a favorite sport. I'm not all that interested in sports. I like to ride bikes but I'm not very knowledgeable about it or interested in it as "sport."

What has been troubling you lately?
Distance. Time travel. My right hip.

Did you enjoy your high school prom? If you haven’t gotten there yet, do you look forward to it? If you didn’t go, why not?
Not really. My prom was populated by the popular people, of which I was not one. Being around those people made me very uncomfortable. It would've been better if I'd felt my own value a little more as a teenager. It was fun to get all dressed up and to go with Adam, because being with Adam was almost always fun, but I was pretty miserable when forced to look beyond his face. We should've gone out somewhere else, instead.

What do you use more often: your intuition or logical reasoning?
Probably intuition. I'm not super logical. I'm totally ruled by my heart, actually. Well, maybe not totally, but enough.

Do you know what makes you happy?
Yes. No, I'm not going to tell you. Well, I will tell you one thing: my adorable, sweet, beautiful boy makes me very happy. There are other things but he's the best.

Tell me about the last book you read.
I finally finished "The Brief Wonderous Life of Oscar Wao," by Junot Diaz. I liked it a lot but it was very sad.

What is the nicest compliment you’ve ever been given?
Recently, a high school kid told me the other day that he really loved my flute playing. I liked what I had played, and I had tried to make it beautiful, so I was glad that he was moved to tell me that. Someone else once told me that they thought that I "don't take any shit." I liked that though I'm not sure it's true. Another person once told me that I had beautiful eyes, and while I also find that one hard to believe (because my eyes are crossed and weird), it was said in a totally believable way, in a totally romantic situation. I want to believe!
Who was your first crush?
I have had lots of crushes! I think the first one was Jeremy. Kindergarten.

Do you believe that there is life on other planets?
I don't know. It's fun to think about but I have no idea. I guess that's a no. Or maybe it's a yes.

Predict what your life will look like a year from now.
JP will hopefully be potty trained. Other than that, I have no idea. Chances are it will look a lot like it does right now. That's mostly OK.

Often, people will ask how your last relationship ended. I want to know how it began.
We met when I was a 16 or 17 year old page at the library. He was probably 21 or 22, way too old for me, a library assistant. He had a crush on me, which was intriguing, because that rarely happened, but he was toooooooo old, and I had a boyfriend. We were friends for a long time, and he was patient.

Where is your favorite place to go out and eat?
Fatburger. La Casita Mexicana. Enrique's.

What is something you want to change about your current situation?
I'd like to get more than 3, 4 hours of sleep at a time. I'd like more opportunites to play my flute, ride my bike, read, cook.

Early bird or night owl?
Unfortunately right now I am both. The kid keeps us up, and then wakes up bright and early, Mr. Happy.

Are there any childhood possessions you still hold on to?
I have my first Yamaha flute, which was actually my sister's. Hopefully one day JP would like to play it but it will require a bit of an overhaul before that's possible. I'm pretty good at giving up crap, though, so I don't have a lot of stuff.
Give me an unpopular opinion you have.
A lot of "alpha mom"-types are advising me that it's time to let JP "cry it out" so that he will sleep on his own. I totally do not believe in this. Neither does Patrick. Not going to happen.

What was the last song that was stuck in your head?
New Toy, by Lene Lovich! Oh ay oh! It's still in there!!!

Where do you live? Be as general or specific as you want.
In the smallest house on the nicest street we could afford. It's green, with a pretty Chinese magnolia tree in front.

Do you believe in giving kids medals and trophies for participation?
I don't know. I'll let you know as JP gets older and this starts happening. I think we got certificates and stuff for getting involved, but depending on the age of the kid, it seems like a medal or a trophy just for showing up is sending the wrong message.

What was the longest car ride you’ve ever taken?
Drew and I drove to Oregon once, in the snow. It was fun. A long, long time ago.

Have you ever taken part in a protest?
No.

Would you ever use an online dating service?
No.

What is your ethnic heritage?
Mexican-American. More American!

Describe a person that inspires you.
Excited by life. Open. Relaxed.

If you earn minimum wage doing what you love, would you?
If I only had myself to worry about, I might consider it. But as this is not the case, nor can it ever be again, no.

Do you believe in luck?
Sure.

Describe the last time you were very angry at someone.
I don't know if I can describe it. It's personal. It got worked out. I think I wasn't so much angry, as disappointed and sad.

Do you want to live until you’re 100?
I don't really want to consider that one day I will die. But...

Do people change? If so, how do you keep a relationship together when both of you start to change?
Yes, people change. You have to want it, and work on it.

Have you ever risked a friendship by telling someone you liked them?
Yes. Multiple times. It usually worked out one way or another.

Would you rather be alone doing something you enjoy, or doing something you don’t like with your best friends?
What a sad question. Right this second I'd rather be with my friends. I guess it depends on what the thing is.

Do you practice what you preach?
I try really hard. I suspect that as JP gets older this will be more important.

If you take precautions to stay safe, do you ultimately act more recklessly?
I can be reckless. Dude, reckless is fun. On the other hand, I absolutely refuse to jaywalk. Jaywalking is stupid.

What do you value more in a significant other: Attractiveness or intelligence?
If I love you, I love you. I think you're attractive based on that.

Are you hard-headed?
I don't think so. Maybe you should ask Patrick.

Have you ever laughed uncontrollably when it was socially inappropriate?
Yes. Uncontrollable laughing is so much fun. Except when it ends in pee.

When have you felt most alive?
I don't know... Maybe during the last solo I performed, which was in December 2010. I was 8-1/2 months pregnant. It wasn't the greatest performance (I made a big mistake; my breathing was wacky; and I was not as in tune as I thought it was); but, all that said: it was the most exciting, most emotional performance I've ever given. I may have been hormonal, but I really felt like I was giving it everything I could give. I can't listen to that solo without tearing up. I felt like I was really doing my best.

Would you prefer to live? A city? The suburbs? The countryside? The mountains?
I would love to find out if I prefer the city to the suburbs. I think I would but I don't know, as I've never lived in a city.

Do you often skip breakfast?
Breakfast lately has been a big cup of coffee and a cookie. Does that count as not skipping breakfast?

How do you know what true love is?
You know.

Would you want to know the exact date and time you were going to die?
It's enough to know that that day is going to come eventually. I'd rather not think about it.

Where is “home” for you?
My little green house.

What song best describes your life right now?
Another Time, by Adrian Belew. Just a gorgeous song.

Do you want to be perfect?
I realize that it's impossible. Doesn't stop me from thinking about it.

What have you never tried, but would really like to someday? What’s holding you back?
Oh, lots and lots of things. What holds me back is easy: fear.

How do you express your creativity?
Musically, writing. I'm not as good at those things as I wish I was, but I could never give either one of them up.

Describe your neighborhood.
Quiet. Safe.

Name something you only liked because it was popular.
This is a funny question. Um... fluorescent colored clothes. When was that? 6th grade?

Give me the story of your life in six words.
Who would have ever thought I could be a mom? Wait, is that ten words? Are you still there?

Meme - Rule of 7

I'm not feeling particularly creative today (my eyes are so red from allergies, I'm sure my co-workers think I've been stoned since Monday. Tom Petty on the iPod isn't helping. What this has to do with feeling creative, I do not know) but I wanted to blog today, so I ripped this off from here. Enjoy.

Seven things that scare me:

1. Spiders, slugs, snails, potato bugs
2. Alien invasion (spiders, slugs, snails, potato bugs...)
3. The ocean (namely, being blind like I am, and hit by a wave, dragged out to sea and drowning; also, creatures in the ocean that look like spiders, slugs, snails, potato bugs)
4. Some of the crazy music that Patrick makes and/or listens to; the artwork that accompanies some of the crazy music that Patrick makes and/or listens to
5. Falling from a great height
6. Speaking in front of large groups of people, particularly at work
7. The day that my laptop dies (it could be soon) and I lose my iTunes library (everything else is backed up on Dropbox). I have an external drive that I've backed up to but not recently. Yes, I need to do it. No, I don't have time right now.

Seven things I like:

1. Adrian Belew, the Talking Heads, Radiohead, X... music in general, these guys in particular right now, very much
2. The song "Bears" by Lyle Lovett (surprise! Betcha didn't see that one coming!)
3. Hugs and kisses, especially from my beautiful boy!
4. Long bike rides
5. Fitting into smaller jeans and pants for the first time in probably 10 years
6. Buying shoes (um... I LOVE buying shoes!)
7. Massages, facials, pedicures, lip gloss, eyebrow waxing: all these so-called "girlie" things that I never thought I would enjoy, but I do

Seven random facts about me:

1. I love the show "The Big Bang Theory" - I crack up, while Patrick sits there, totally unimpressed, wondering when "Pawn Stars" is on again
2. I have a little patch of freckles on my left shoulder, and a few on my face (with my complexion, that's a little unexpected). This was recently pointed out by my esthetician, who quickly said that they were "cute," and didn't look overtly "age-related." Um, thanks?
3. I love the swings at the park
4. I like to redesign parking lots in my head
5. I don't like strangers talking about Jesus to me
6. I'm better at relaxing than I thought I was
7. I've worked in the light/sound booth at City Garage more times than anyone, ever. Of this I am proud. Can you tell?

Seven things I want to do before I die:

2. Learn how to drive a motorcycle (is "drive" the right word? Obviously I have some lingo to learn too)
3. Take a bike tour of Europe
4. Sleep more than 2 hours in a row
5. Eat a meal, have a conversation with Stewart Copeland
6. Write a song
7. Remodel my house

Seven things I can do well:

1. Organize my desk
2. Make Ina Garten's Cranberry Conserve
3. Drive
4. Play the flute
5. Worry
6. Soothe my boy
7. Get lost in a book and/or music, sometimes at the same time

Seven things I can't do but wish I could:

2. Time travel
3. Write a story that other people would want to read (blogging doesn't count)
4. See without glasses
5. Apply makeup
6. Buy, wear jewelry
7. Sing

Seven phrases I'm known to use:

1. "Dear Stewart,"
2. (not a euphemism)
3. Then again...
4. On the other hand,
5. That's/you're awesome/rad/delicious
6. Fucking shit!
7. Holy cow!