Sunday, April 5, 2015

This is the Voice. Oh, wait, no it isn't - it's just me.

I've been watching the Voice again this season, but unfortunately I'm not able to tune in when the show is actually on so I keep up thanks to Hulu.

The live shows start tomorrow, though, and I keep thinking I'd like to live blog them. In anticipation of my having time to do that (as unlikely as that is), I offer my opinion on the show and the contestants thus far.

The Judges:

Blake: I love him. I have a feeling Blake doesn't say everything he really thinks - his on-air personality feels a bit manufactured sometimes. I don't know anything about him as a country singer or performer or a celebrity. Aside from knowing he's married to Miranda Lambert and he acts like he drinks a lot, I don't know anything about him as a person, either. His opinions and instincts most of the time mirror mine, but since I'm nobody and he's a star, this doesn't matter very much for me. I believe that he has the strongest team.

Christina: Man, she's talented. Her music isn't the kind of thing I like now, or ever did, even when I was younger, but I am so impressed with her. She's smart. She knows music. She's a great coach. She has the second strongest team, I think. Again: not my kind of thing but my personal tastes in music have nothing to do with who should win this show. Obviously.

Adam: He's an attention whore. His fake feud with Blake is annoying and his stupid comments are the worst. He sort of knows music (though, his advice to that kid who sang the Pearl Jam song made me cringe) and that's fine but I think what he really knows and excels at, is getting people to look at him. He's educated himself about music enough to get to where he is, and he can sing the sort of songs he sings and that's fine, but I'm not buying whatever he's selling. However, his team has most of my favorites, so I'm going to have to be sure I can fully justify any mean comments I have to make about him.

Pharrell: He had the most interesting team, but the kids he has left are, for me, except for one major exception, forgettable. If one of them wins this show I will be shocked, though it would be totally due to his coaching and bringing something out in them they weren't going to reveal on their own. His advice and sort of Jedi-master style are wonderful. He seems like a fun guy, who has a love for music, and for the contestants on the show. Maybe in real life he's an asshole (how would I know?) but I don't think so. Well, I hope not. I'd like to hang out with him and just listen to him talk.

The Contestants

Team Blake

Brooke: She can sing, but I don't think the song choices have been quite right, yet. She's so young, it's hard to say what she can do.

Hannah: Love her. Though whoever let her choose that 80s song (and now I can't remember what it was. "I Wanna Know What Love Is"? It was something horrible) did her a great disservice. Oh: it was "Higher Love." I don't think Steve Winwood songs are going to have a revival. There could be a taste issue here. Her attitude and smile are infectious, though. She's a very good singer, and a fun performer to watch. She truly is "not like anyone else," as the judges are so fond of telling these people.

Meghan: I was really disappointed when she said she was going to do "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman." These singing shows are so much like karaoke, and that song in particular is a cliche for strong female singers. Yes, she killed it: she had to, didn't she? To fall down on that one would've been career suicide. But if she'd killed us with something less obvious I think I would respect her more.

Corey: I feel like Corey is learning how to use his emotions to sell a song. Now: he's an experienced performer, so maybe he knew this already. He has a lovely voice, isn't ugly, and seems to be really learning things and growing as a performer. I look forward to his performances.

Sarah: I feel like I've seen and or heard this woman before. That's not bad. She's fine. Maybe I'm really feeling her Grace Slick vibe and I'm surprised no one else has mentioned it. I like Grace Slick, that's not a slam. I'd like to see what else she can do.

Team Christina

India: I loved her bio when they introduced her. She started out interesting. Her voice is lovely, but she's just not a compelling performer. And look, I know this is superficial, but I preferred her personal style. That leather jacket they keep showing her in drives me crazy.

Kimberly: She could be so good! Again, I think the song choices are hurting her. "If You Love Somebody" is the weakest Sting song ever. Well, maybe not ever. She should have sung something else from that album. "Consider Me Gone" would've been my choice for her. Even I can sing that song. Imagine what someone with talent could do with it?

Lexi: She has a great story, and can sing. Other than that I haven't been blown away, yet.

Rob: Dude has some awesome hair. He's not perfect but he feels it when he sings: you can tell. I think his future performances might be surprising. He kind of snuck in there, didn't he?

Sonic: Okay, look. I don't want to be mean. But Sonic has been oversold, don't you think? She's fine, I guess, but what she's trying to accomplish... well, I don't think she has the chops for the type of songs she's been singing.

Team Adam

Brian: I love this guy. Seriously. From his blind audition to now, he hasn't done one thing wrong. I just love his voice.

Deanna: I like her unusual voice, but sometimes she sounds too much like Cher when she sings. That's not a terrible thing but it is distracting.

Nathan: Another one! I loved his blind audition, too. This kid could make me cry with his voice. He could, but he hasn't yet. But he's so close! He also seems like he's having so much fun. Enjoy it, kid, you're doing a great job.

Tonya: I love her story! Teaching music to people in jail is such an honorable thing to do. And she's fun to watch and listen to. I think she's saving up something special for the live shows.

Joshua: He needs to be careful: he's a great singer, but he's kind of treading the line over to campfire song territory. I'd like to hear him rock out. Another one of my favorites.

Team Pharrell

Caitlin: Caitlin has failed to make an impression on me.

Lowell: Lowell has failed to make an impression on me.

Mia Z. - Mia can sing but I think, again, that she's not as great as the show wants me to think it thinks she is.

Koryn: Koryn has failed to make an impression on me.

Sawyer: I LOVE SAWYER. He's so good! He chooses unusual songs and he has so much personality and creativity when he sings. He's my favorite, I love his performances!

Okay, well, I've wasted enough time (mine and yours) with this. If I can manage it, I'll live blog tomorrow night. If not, I'll make comments as I catch up on Hulu.

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