So tired!

I think I was warned that this would happen but I didn't really believe it.

I have never been so tired in my entire life.

My allergies are acting up, and my doctor said I could take ceterizine (generic for Zyrtec) in the evenings if I needed extra help (she also said it's okay to take while breastfeeding; though the manufacturer doesn't recommend it). However, she warned me that it would make me sleepy.

I'm not taking it. I'm not crazy - if I get any sleepier I'll be incapacitated. Comatose.

Example: this morning I went to pump. My work has made this really easy for me, and I'm lucky because it's been a good experience (so many people told me about their struggles with pumping at work, which leads to the horror of issues with milk production, but so far it's been fine for me). There's a little lounge adjacent to the ladies' room that I usually use, but sometimes it's not available (someone might be in there taking a nap!). When that happens, the section manager next door to my office allows me to use his conference room. The conference room is bigger than the lounge (and my cell phone works in there so I can read something) but I like going to the lounge better because his room doesn't have a sink (so I have to go wash my hands, then come all the way back...). Anyway, I was in the conference room this morning, getting all set up. Turned the pump on. A couple of minutes (maybe 1.5 minutes!) went by and I realized that I had forgotten to screw the bottles on.

I basically pumped a tiny amount of milk onto my pants.

Stupid. Luckily it dried quickly and didn't stain (don't think breastmilk doesn't stain: it totally does).

Before I had to go back to work, it was easy to get my housework done, and I could function a little better on the amount of sleep I've been getting. But now that I have to be at work at 7 and awake (not just awake! Functional!) all day, it's a lot harder. I still want to keep the house clean and get the laundry done but that stuff is less important than making sure there are enough clean bottles for the baby and that I get in some time "face jamming" with him.


During the week, I've been doing my best to drink enough water, eat enough, go to sleep as soon as the baby does... but dude. I am TIRED. And I've been having the craziest dreams, maybe because I don't get to sleep longer than 4 hours? Seriously, bizarre dreams! And there have been famous people in them - Rob Lowe, Goldie Hawn, that tall goofy guy on "How I Met Your Mother." Strangeness!

Everyone keeps asking me if the baby is sleeping through the night. Nope. He falls asleep around 8:30 p.m., and will sleep until 12:30 or 1:30. Then he wakes up to eat, but he eats just "half"... because he falls back asleep (and so do I). After that he's up again a couple of hours later... and then again, a couple of hours later. By that time it's time to get up for work.

I've been reading about sleeping through the night, though, and I'm not concerned that he doesn't. It would be nice to be able to nap during the day when I'm at work but with my pumping schedule there's no time (it would also be nice to take a walk! but again, there's no time). Anyway, I would miss waking up with him and having those moments with him to feed him.

I'm glad I have a short week: by the time it's Thursday, I'm so ready for Friday, when I get him all to myself.

I've got it all planned: we're going to sleep as much as possible. And maybe do some laundry.