Genie-ass; Yearbook Saturday

Everybody probably noticed, a few updates ago, that iTunes added this silly new Genius feature - you pick a song, and Genius makes you a playlist from your iTunes library (or suggests songs from the iTunes store) of complementary songs. I wasn't sure about using it because it seemed a little invasive for my tastes, but then decided what the hell. And... apparently iTunes has a different definition of "complementary" than I do.

The following playlist was suggested by iTunes for the song "Relatin' Dudes to Jazz" by fIREHOSE. Oh, and by the way? I didn't ask Genius for this playlist. It did it all by itself. I'm still trying to figure out what these songs, exactly, have in common. And waiting for my computer to start calling me "Dave."

1. Relatin' Dudes to Jazz - fIREHOSE
2. The Man Who Sold the World - David Bowie
3. Just Like Heaven - The Cure
4. Myage - Descendents
5. Banned in D.C. - Bad Brains
6. Born in the 50s - The Police
7. Ana Ng - They Might Be Giants
8. Party at Ground Zero - Fishbone
9. The Mayor of Simpleton - XTC
10. The Softest Hammer - fIREHOSE
11. Bron-Y-Aur Stomp - Led Zeppelin
12. Space Oddity - David Bowie
13. Down by the Water - PJ Harvey
14. Hanging on the Telephone - Blondie
15. Can't Get There From Here - R.E.M.
16. Bela Lugosi's Dead - Bauhaus
17. Bring On the Night - The Police
18. On Your Knees - fIREHOSE
19. Gigantic - Pixies
20. Making Plans for Nigel - XTC
21. Gloria - U2
22. Destination Unknown - Missing Persons
23. Against the 70s - Mike Watt
24. Dirty Boots - Sonic Youth
25. Gardening at Night - R.E.M.

I'm listening to it now, and I'm confused. Not that these are bad songs, because of course they came from my own library (though... I'm going to lose all the They Might Be Giants, I think. I never listen to them and if I do get a song when the iPod is on shuffle, I skip them. They just annoy me now), I just don't see the connections.

I mean, a Genius is someone who is smarter than me, right? So maybe I'm just too stupid to get it. Thanks, Apple. That's a great feeling.

...

Still working on the '88 yearbook. Look, I have next to nothing planned for today, so maybe later I'll go dig around in the garage and see if I can find the other ones.

Today's entry is from... well, read it yourself:

Irene,

What do I say? I don't know. I guess I've known you for quite a while. Even though there have been occasional bad times, they have been mostly good. This is hard to write. If you think any differently, I'll set you straight. I've always considered you a friend. We've been through too much not to be. Just because you had that year of weakness, it doesn't really bother me. You were still a friend anyway. You're a good person, don't forget that. Just relax, a little. Anyway, I don't know know what else to say, so stay essentially the same, don't change much, and stay away from the library.

Love,
Barry

It's interesting, because I met my husband at the library (a couple of years later).

And yes, telling me to "relax" was apparently the theme of the yearbook. Jesus. One girl recommended that hook up with some "homo sapien males." I won't quote her completely, but that's just weird. It also appears that my friends thought it was okay to mention the actual name of the actual boy I was ob--

(Wait. A man in a suit just rang the doorbell.

I'm not here, man. Now he's caucusing with a couple of old ladies with questionable hairdos... and they're standing in front of my house, writing shit down. Dudes. I'm not here.)

Whatever. I'm not going to worry about the other stuff.

Thanks, Barry. That was a nice thing to write.