Changes

I don't know how to start this one other than by jumping right in, so here goes:

Since last week, my milk production at work has been waaaaay down. Since I came back to work, almost a year ago, I've pumped 3 times a day. I've gotten anywhere from 12-16 ounces a day (total). Yesterday, though I still pumped 3 times, I only got 5 ounces.

This scared the hell out of me.

This is the milk that JP needs to take to daycare, to drink when he's with his daddy, when I'm at flute choir.

Yesterday, I talked to my friend Teresa, who has a lot of knowledge about this topic (she works with nursing moms, and she also has an adorable 10 month old, and a teenager; she has experience!), and she helped me calm down.

I know that JP is getting older, and eating more "real food," and that just because I stop pumping during the day, that doesn't mean I will stop nursing him when I'm home. For some reason, though, I felt weird about it. I'm glad I talked to her because she reminded me that it's totally normal. So, over the next couple of weeks, I'm going to taper off at work.

On the one hand... my little man is growing up, and that makes me feel sad. I learned so much from that little baby, about my body, my abilities, and about him as an infant. Now that he's getting older I know I will learn even more.

On the other hand, I was so sick of pumping! It used up my breaks; when I went to training or meetings, I had to make sure there was a lactation room. I'll get to go for walks again, or take a nap in my car: these are good things. And I won't miss having to wash everything every night to make sure I have bottles and parts for the next day.

I called his daycare this morning and talked to the director. She's so nice - they take such good care of him there. They're going to start him out slowly, and I think today he's going to try drinking what the other kids are drinking (milk, I mean; they've been giving him a little juice and water for a few months). I hope he doesn't mind it.