Control-V

I received the following message in my Yahoo inbox. I've copied and pasted it below for your enjoyment. (Control-V seems to be playing an important role in my life these days. I'm not going to explain that actually, but will just tell you to be careful when you "copy" and "paste." Pay attention.)

Anyway, re: the following message. I don't know what to say, except, why would anyone in their right mind A) reply to such a message, and B) WRITE such a message? I realize that English is not everyone's first language. I get it. But the text below kinda screams wacko to me, and I hope to you too. I mean, who hasn't seen those stories on TV about lonely women falling in love with some guy on the Internet based on a photo? And then it turns out that the photo is some model who had no idea his image was being used to lure people into online "relationships" they end up literally paying for? I mean, jeez. I'm sorry people are so naive. And I'm kind of sorry I'm so cynical.

And I mean, god, spelling and grammatical errors aside, just what does this person want, anyway? Video? Pictures? To be my "friend"? Honey, I have friends, thanks.

(Several hours after posting this message:)

I've had some time to look up the dude who sent me the following message (the message came through via my now defunct Yahoo! 360 blog, so it was easy to link back to his page). He has 27 friends, all of them, um, let's just say, zaftig. They're big girls. And kinda slutty. But it all seemed sort of stupid and totally un-sexy. I'm wondering what it was about my photos or blog that led him to believe I might fit in with his other "girls" (I mean, yeah, I could stand to lose 10 pounds but "Emmanuelle" is not listed in my "Favorite Movies" list). Anyway, fuckin' creep. What is it with people?

Here's his message:

very important for the pretty queen hello pretty queen ..i was very lucky to see your profile on yahoo your pic attracted and excite me soo much ...ohh iam sorry my name is Ahmed iam 37 years old , bussines man from Dubai ,single, i wish that you add me to your yahoo messanger and to join my dear freinds who gives me cam shows and of course it is payed ones as i do pay for each 1800$ + special Gifts per month for 10 shows each show is 30 minutes and they do recive money throw western union so i wish that you do accept to be my freind add me in your yahoo messanger... [email address deleted by Irene the Bean]...and we will be both lucky but if you are not intrested then ignore that message and we will lose both of us but belive me you are lucky to recive my offer ...[Guy's name deleted by Irene the Bean] - Dubai